The day i met Chucky, is the day i first smoked meth
Been spun so long now i may never catch my breath
Full of secrets, constant lies, true colors will always shine through
Lived in denial long enough my eyes were more black than blue Continue reading “Devastation, destruction, where do I go from here?”
–CATACLYSMIC adjective: cataclysmic relating to or denoting a violent natural event. synonyms:disastrous, catastrophic, calamitous, tragic, devastating, ruinous, terrible, violent, awful”the cataclysmic Krakatoa eruption of 1883″antonyms:fortunate, beneficial INFORMALused to emphasize the extent of something bad or unwelcome.”the concert was a cataclysmic failure” –CHAOS noun complete disorder and confusion.”snow caused chaos in the region”synonyms:disorder, disarray, disorganization, confusion, mayhem, bedlam, pandemonium, madness, havoc, turmoil, tumult, commotion, disruption, upheaval, furor, frenzy, uproar, hue and cry, babel, hurly-burly; More PHYSICSbehavior so unpredictable as to appear random, owing to great sensitivity to small changes in conditions. the formless matter supposed to … Continue reading Whats in a name? Meaning of my Titles
October 5, 2017 Beaten, battered, bruised, and shatteredHeartbroken, forgotten what once matteredToxic love starts to clot, turns to bittersweet hateCant escape, living an illusion with a doomed fateScreams should be silenced, when the voice is undergroundBut the cries of a victim is a haunting, endless soundHe’d do anything for her, he’d kill for her, on his kids he sworeTelling her he loves her, as he … Continue reading “Broken Ending”
{ once upon a meth addict} (I wrote this after Chucky and I made phosphorous dope. This is an unfinished copy- The second page got misplaced and it doesn’t feel right to rewrite it now.) October 16, 2017 A boy and girl, collide, intertwine, start to dateA fairytale spun predictable fateFight them sober, Scare them straightWatch them crumble, How easy they break Deep denial, both … Continue reading “Icy Slope”
{ cataclysmic chaos} Meth addicts i know typically have what is essentially there ” tweaker zone” (mine is my master bathroom) They often pick these spots without even realizing it, and it becomes the place they feel safest and most comfortable. They will habitually return to that zone to use, to tweak, and will likely get “spun” (stuck) there for hours at a time, possibly … Continue reading Tales of a Tweaker- The Shed Life
{ cataclysmic Chaos} January 2018 Chucky and I were actually getting along, something that was getting increasingly rare. Enjoying a few days spent laying around, playing chess, watching Shameless, and having sex. When we weren’t fighting, we generally had a fantastic time together, it never seemed to matter what we were doing, as long as we were together. It was the middle of the afternoon … Continue reading Icy Insides – A Dopeman and Dealers Downtime
{original Journal} **This is a copy of one of the original journal entries that I wrote when I had just started doing meth. It was the beginning of my addiction, and the start of a diary I titled “Once Upon a Meth Addict”** December 10, 2016 5:12 a.m. With barely any sleep in days, the world starts to change in wired ways. It begins to … Continue reading Sacrificed Sleep – Spun with Shots and Shadows **Journal Entry**
{ original journal} **This is the original journal entry that I wrote when I started getting high. It was the beginning of my addiction, and the start of a diary I titled “Once Upon a Meth Addict”** December 7, 2016 3:27 a.m. Why am I writng this, starting a new journal, in the middle of the night? I have been thinking about all of it, … Continue reading The Beginning – Trimming to Tweaking Part 1 {12/7/16}
{original journal} **This is the 2nd part of the original journal entry that I wrote when I started getting high. It was the beginning of my addiction, and the start of a diary I titled “Once Upon a Meth Addict”** December 7, 2016 5:57 a.m. Continued……. Coming home that Thursday, I had my first bag, and immediately chopped out a line. Ice burns like hell. … Continue reading The Beginning – Trimming to Tweaking Part 2 {12/7/16}
I began dealing out of spite, to piss Chucky off, to take his customers and friends. I was bitter and angry and thought I had something to prove. I didn’t ever expect for it to progress as far and as fast as it did, or end as badly. Even with what happened though, I can say that it lead to some damn good times and … Continue reading Dealing to Stealing – The $100 King
Once Upon A Meth Addict 